Rome Wars Episode Six: That New One They Really Shouldn’t Be Making

I begin this post with an apology (Actually, I begin it with a title that doesn’t really make sense, but SHOULD, because they’re making a new Star Wars movie after a long hiatus, just as I am writing a new blog post after a conspicuously long absence, and like the imminent feature film, no one was really holding their breath). I am sorry for failing to update you all on my latest Rome escapades. I’ve actually been back from Rome for literally months (I returned in mid March, after a thrilling week-long tour of Europe with the charming Katie Hake, who wore the same pair of pants for the entire trip and I did not notice), so there should really be a lot to catch you up on, while in fact there are really only two more email updates, a photo of Katie and I with a man in a bear costume at Brandenburger Tor in Berlin, and a failed attempt at a travel diary logged during my train rides.


BUT ALAS, you are here for a Rome update, and this you shall receive. Behold, the extremely delayed Overly Detailed Email Update Numero Sei:

My luck has changed, friends.

I have not waited for a bus for more than 4 minutes all week (I’m at the bus stop as I write this, probably jinxing it so hard). Apart from some unfortunate breakfast-lunch mushrooms Sunday when I didn’t drag my sorry ass out of bed until 12:30, I have been spared any previously-cooked-but-now-cold-and-squishy vegetables of nebulous variety. Last night for dinner, I had spaghetti Parmesan, chicken (meat!!!!!!!) and FRENCH FRIES BC MY LIFE IS AWESOME.

I went to Florence this weekend sans teachers, and we all went out with wild abandon, since we didn’t have to worry about taking night buses and getting stuck outside the Vatican at 4 am with a night bus driver named Dennis encouraging us to sit on the dashboard. Ahem.
Apparently I stole a black man’s earring and attempted to trade it for my own. I believe we talked about Pisa. I also later cried hysterically on poor Matt Barnes for like six hours on the street, and I’m not even sure why.

We also climbed to the top of the Duomo church the next day, which was like 82949194 stairs, but the view from the top was amazing.

I have now been waiting for the bus for like 9 minutes. The board says all of them are “in arrivo” and yet none of them are arriving.

I got my hair cut. Other than the words “we need a bigger sink,” I understood nothing of what happened and just made scissors with my fingers every time she asked me a question. She may have said something about selling my hair…

I have six thousand projects due this week, so that’s casual.

I made my first Animal House joke to an AD yesterday.

The bus is finally coming.

People actually say “mamma mia” here when they’re agitated, and I don’t think that will ever get old.


Still haven’t found any SmartFood popcorn 😦 I did discover something called “chipsters” though, so i guess I’m assimilating nicely.

The bus has been within eyesight for 3 minutes and has not yet arrived. Yes Rome traffic.

In finally on the bus. I’m risking my life by not holding on with both hands. L’autobus waits for no man. I’m quite confident I will eat it spectacularly one of these days.

Pretty sure we were cursed by a gypsy panhandler in Florence.

Sarah Heyborne has not been responding to my snapchats, FB messages, or obnoxious wall comments. I begin to suspect she is angry with me, and it makes me very sad 😦

I fell asleep last night to the host-uncle’s vigorous bumping of Daft Punk. One more time?

Probably the highlight of my week was finding a roll if toilet paper above the mirror in my shoebox sized bathroom. I’d run out, but as I did not know the word for “toilet paper” in Italian and felt inexplicably embarrassed, I was totally just planning on peeing at school for the rest if my life.

That’s more or less all that’s new with me right now, other then that I’m prob going to be late to school for the first time this morning. Whoops. At least it’s given me time to email you wonderful people. Miss you all!



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